Being single used to mean that nobody wanted you. Now it means you're pretty sexy and you're taking your time deciding how you want your life to be and who you want to spend it with.
Romance permeates our thoughts, dreams, movies, and almost everything we listen to. And why not? The essence of life is romance. It's a love celebration.
The best part about romance is that you don't need a partner to enjoy it. Some of us associate romance with a bouquet of flowers or a fancy dinner. For others, it's a cup of coffee or breakfast in bed, as well as a handwritten note.
Self-romance should be an essential part of a self-care routine. You'll be with yourself for the rest of your life, so why not start caring for yourself and treating yourself as your best friend and lover.
What is Self-Romance
Everyone has their definition of romance, but we can all agree that romance means feeling affection, passion, and strong feelings.
Self-romance is self-love taken to new heights. It should include acts of pure indulgence.
"Romancing Yourself" occurs when you devote time to yourself – when you get to know yourself, spending time with your passions and joys. Romance is in the details, in showing yourself that you care. When you romance yourself, you nourish and bring out your inner radiance. You focus on the details that are important and meaningful to you. And you delight in your senses, allowing yourself to be surprised by how wonderful things smell, taste, look, and feel.
Why Romance Yourself
Emotionally tending to your own needs, including self-romance, will make you feel cared for and may positively affect your love life.
How many horror stories have you heard about people hooking up with people who are entirely inappropriate for them? I've heard quite a few. I believe that a large part of it stems from the fact that so many of us are unsure of what we truly desire in a partner. Would you be able to describe your ideal lover if I asked you? Not their physical characteristics, but the aspects of their personality that are important to you. So many people are simply unaware.
I believe that to find your soul mate, you must first discover yourself and who you are, so date yourself and learn about who and what you want.
To reduce the number of horrible relationship disasters, it makes sense first to get to know and love yourself before attempting to do the same for another person. Perhaps it is time to start dating yourself.
How To Romance Yourself
How are you able to accomplish such a feat? The short answer is to treat yourself as if you are head over heels in love with someone. What would you do for your ideal partner? Would you prepare delicious meals for them, take them to the movies, or fly them to Paris for the weekend? Now is the time to start doing that for yourself!
Envision how you'd feel if you felt the same way about yourself as you do about your soul mate. What could you achieve if you wanted to please, delight, and excite yourself with the same zeal that you would a new lover?
Contemplate having a new love in your life and the excitement that comes with looking forward to being with them and starting a new life with them. Recreate that sense of anticipation for yourself.
If you want the best for yourself, show up and do your best. You are as deserving of the best as any other human being.
Here are some questions to ask yourself to get you started on your journey of self-romance. Assume your new love calls you up for a date:
What would he be saying to you? That he can't wait to spend time with you? He can't wait to see you?
When he arrives at your door
Does he tell you how beautiful you look?
Does he bring you some flowers?
Do you stay home and have a meal?
Do you go out to a fancy restaurant?
Do you go for a picnic?
Do you find a good lookout point and share a bottle of wine?
Plan a special date and do those same things for yourself.
Every day, tell yourself that you are beautiful. While getting ready to face the world, look in the mirror and say, "You know what? You're incredibly beautiful/gorgeous/sexy." (Whatever is preferable for you.) Saying this aloud may make you feel like the world's most tragic person at first, so try saying it in a silly voice and making it more like a comedy routine. But I promise you that after a while, you'll start to believe it — and you'll leave the house feeling so much better because you know you like yourself.
Go On Dates with Yourself
Take yourself on solo dates around your city.
Many people are afraid to go to the movies or eat dinner by themselves! Learn to accept it, even if you're scared of it. There's no reason to be afraid of your own company, and if your primary concern is that people are judging you, trust me: they're not. They probably think you're brave and that you're watching a movie alone for some mysterious reason. Visit museums, dance parties, art exhibitions, and parks. You do not have to wait for others to accompany you to do what you want! Going out with friends is fun but seeing the world on your own is an entirely different experience. Not to mention that dancing is one of the most fun and sexiest things you can do.
Buy Yourself Some Flowers
Purchase a large bouquet of your favorite flowers and place them somewhere you can admire them regularly. Perhaps next to your bed or at your workplace desk. Remember to make a mental note to remind yourself that they reflect your love for yourself.
Browse in a Bookstore
If you want to immerse yourself in cookbooks, home décor publications, or vacation magazines, go ahead and do it! Allow yourself to stroll around the floor, from rack to rack, upstairs and downstairs to the basement. Make a list of the books that fascinate you and don't let your rational mind take over. This is a fantastic method to get to know oneself.
Explore Your Sexuality
This is a critical component of the entire process! Understand what turns you on and what simply turns you off. After all, how will your prospective lover know what you want if you don't know what you want? Read erotica, rent porn, do "research" online and go to sex shops.
Set the tone for your next masturbation session with a hot playlist, scented candle or incense, and your favorite sensuous toys. Put yourself to the test, for this is your chance for a very erotic encounter.
Write Yourself a Love Letter
Your body is magnificent. It is what keeps you alive. It enables you to complete all of your daily tasks.
Have you ever written a love letter to your body? It's vital to take a moment to think about what we appreciate and admire about ourselves. Acknowledge the qualities that make you proud.
Consider all of the things your body allows you to perform. What issues does your brilliant mind solve? How many beautiful children have you carried? Are your hands smooth and comforting when there are tears and pains? Is your lap suitable for cuddling? Are your legs lengthy and luscious? Is it your smile that elicits a response from the rest of the world?
Examine every curve on your body and marvel at every wrinkle, blemish, and scar.
Love your body and allow it to empower you to love it even more by making decisions that will help it stay or become even more lovable with each passing year.
You should appreciate your body because it is the only one you have. Admire it and support it. Feel it test you as you lean, stretch, and exercise. Massage your aching muscles.
Rub your tummy and notice how it expands and contracts with each inhale and exhale. You should be proud of your round bottom and breasts.
Love you with all the heart and ferocity with which you love others.
Plan a Special Date
Get in the habit of dressing up, taking selfies, and treating yourself to dinner and even a movie.
Make a spa day of it. Light some candles, play romantic music and take a bubble bath while sipping your favorite beverage. After that, apply hair conditioning treatments, a face mask, a rich body butter, and file your nails.
It makes no difference whether you have a partner or not. You don't have to rely on someone else to feel loved, whole, and treasured. Because YOU are the most important person in your life, you should ideally be taking steps to honor and respect yourself.
Self-romancing is a way of life. It's not something you reach for when you've overcommitted yourself.
Because I desire to wow myself, I continuously think of new methods to please and indulge myself.
Putting self-romance on the table is always a bright idea, regardless of your relationship status.
You don't have to wait until Valentine's Day to do these things! Doing them regularly will help you enhance your entire physical, mental, and spiritual self.
A little romance tossed your way is a great thing, no matter who you are or what has happened in your life. We don't consider ourselves to be "worth" the effort most of the time. It's well worth it when we consider all that we've overcome, we really are fantastic!